I don't.
In all honesty, I don't manage it.
I lose my mind. Often.
I meltdown. At least once a day.
I crumble at the slightest inconvenience. This occurs (without fail) immeasurable times a day.
I think part of my unmanageability stems from my autism, but the other part is just my inability to cope with the idea I'm not perfect and perfection is an unattainable goal (that doesn't stop me from trying 😭).
I'm not sure if it was mentioned before, but I work in taxes. I've been in this field for 5 tax seasons now and just shy of 4.5 years at my amazing firm.
I. Love. Busy. Season.
It's a high stress time of year but I truly appreciate the ability to work remote and I'm pretty damn successful at what I do.
I have incredible employers.
They took a shot on me, someone who's background was in banking, and they invested the time in me to get me to where I'm at today.
I am forever grateful.
However, this week, I fell out of gratitude.
I was bitching this week about the most absurd things and I'm grateful for my admin team member who let me just vomit all over her about it but then didn't feed into it (or respond) and hours later she asked me a work related question.
I needed that.
I needed someone to not feed my irrational beast.
She definitely listened, but don't acknowledge my chaos.
It was perfect.
I do just fine magnifying my slight inconveniences without a hype woman to make it worse.
Trust and believe, I've got that shit covered!
I think the catalyst to my downward spiral was our experience with a moving company that rattled and shook our foundation.
I contemplated posting my very candid and honest review on my website, but what good would that do?
If you're interested in reading my not so pretty review, then feel free to wander here
It's the most recent review.
The stress from that, compounded with lack of help during this first week in our new home, and pulling 10 hour days while simultaneously trying to put our new home together and manage an entire household, it was a recipe for disaster.
So, the unmanageable tirade continued.
Until today.
Some highlights of this week:
We pulled off moving the rest of our household the day we needed to turn in keys despite lack of help (aside from my parents).
We got in these amazing barstools for our breakfast bar. Unfortunately the color we bought sold out (unfortunate for you 😂). They are pictured below #3.
This is the first Friday in over a month I'm starting the day caught up on all my tasks!!!!
In case you haven't caught on yet, the "unmanageablity" I'm claiming runs rampant in my mind is just that.
A distorted view of my life because I can't accept life on life's terms more days than I will ever openly admit!
I invite you to look at your life, all of it, and ask yourself
Is this worth my time?!
--Is the failed moving experience worth anymore than a second of my life?
--Is the current views I have of my job truth or is it a result of inner turmoil and unsatisfaction with my present state?
--Will sharing this thought or information benefit me (or anyone else) in the long run?
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